(Inspired by a Coventry Writers' Group prompt of "Shadows". Bit rough and ready, and doesn't fully scan - will need a rework - but not bad for something knocked up in my lunch hour)
Mrs. Ethel Grove of Kettering,
Was the first to spot the happening,
Whilst hanging washing in the morning sun,
Announced, “Bleeding heck, me shadows gone.”
And, like the rest, joined the parade,
Of those whose shade had been mislaid,
The familiar dark at mankind’s feet,
Replaced by boiling bright concrete.
And not just man, but all known things,
Were orphaned from their tethered twins.
A planet of wildlife, quite dismayed,
Nowhere to hide in once leaf-shadowed glades
Scientists too, could shed no light,
On this new unusual worldwide plight,
(Experiments with light refraction were
met with little satisfaction).
Boffins spoke of solar radiation,
Of uninterrupted illumination
But as to why, or what, or who,
They clearly had no fucking clue.
Theologians offered empty manifesto,
Yea, the valley of death sadly now without shadow
On the topic of shadows, the bible reveals naught -
(Cliff Richard, I hear, was particularly distraught).
Perspiring philosophers and sweaty logicians
Would argue over the reasons for our shadow’s omissions -
Perhaps our shackled shades had sought adventure,
A freedom from a lifetimes burdened indenture.
Perhaps they’d just all grown rather annoyed,
Merely existing as a darkened two-dimensional void,
Maybe they were bored, had become disenchanted,
Of hanging around with us, being taken for granted.
Spies were redundant, forced into new careers,
And consider the unemployed shadow puppeteers,
Boxing training was plagued by the wealth of sunlight,
You can’t shadow box with no opponent to fight.
This odorous sphere now offers scant shelter,
Nowhere to hide from torrid swelter,
Each beach and meadow and town now stinks,
Of Mum roll-on and cans of Lynx.
Yet just as mankind had begun to regret,
The absence of our once reliable silhouettes,
They all simply reappeared without fanfare or fuss,
Our lightless companions now returned to us.
And, as mankind is wont, the whole thing was forgot,
Did we learn any lessons? Of course, we did not.
But were reminded again, after a few weeks had gone,
When the shadows started moving all on their own.