Lilith Court - An Okituary
Lilith was born in Nuneaton in 2005, the proud Polydactyl owner of more toes than any of her siblings. She escaped to Coventry later that year, accompanied by brother Aslan. Later in life, she would grow into her abnormally large ears, but never quite grow large enough for her abnormally large feet, described by onlookers as resembling white boxing gloves.
Aslan was the runt of the litter and Lilith felt duty-bound to protect her younger brother, often giving up her food to the ginger fluffball so that he might thrive. This is something she would make up for later in life, considering it her God given right to finish any food left over by her brother and adopted sister. Or food left unattended for more than six seconds.
With a promising career in the dietary industry, she settled into a career in food appreciation at a very early age - with her favourite meals being chicken, beef, fish, prawns, lamb, tuna, and anything edible.
Several years later, Stepsister Twist arrived at the house, and Lilith’s perfect pink nose was put perfectly out of joint, the young upstart rapidly becoming the dominant female feline. Lilith would later come to terms with this, deciding to expend her considerable energies into mastering sleeping and napping.
In her later years, she had convinced herself that was not in fact a cat but a human being, chattering merrily to any people who might strike up a conversation, and insistent at being the centre of attention at any human gatherings. “Look at my stomach, look at it,” was her party icebreaker.
Lilith went by many names in her sixteen well-spent years, including Lil, Chunk, Lilly Pie, Lilliput, Big L, Lillipede, Triple L, and Fat Pawed Fuck.
Her hobbies included, but were not restricted to:
· Waking up in the middle of night and miaowing noisily, panicked that she’d been left on her own.
· Lying outside in the sunshine and pretending she had a solar powered stomach.
· Receiving scritches under her Desperate Dan like chin.
· Relaxing on Tara’s lap - or David’s lap if she absolutely had to.
Her brother, Aslan, survives her along with a stepsister, Twist, and David and Tara, two heartbroken members of her devoted human team of staff.
Lilith Court, née Watson – 2005-2021